yeurgh. brain matter does not look good on camera.

what is brain matter on polaroid but bits of gooey grey on a red backdrop?

and is my boogie really brain shit? if so, i'm having a REALLY shitty day, y'all.

word. (oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah...)

what the hell, larh. im so muthafuckin bored here. spent my day studying anf i cant seem to remember if chlorine is more reactive than magnesium.

saved by the phone.. my boyfriend called.. nw discussing the fine difference between excuses and reasons.., and im going to make him watch THE PRINCESS DIARIES 2!!! bwahahaha.

witing up to watch 'queer eye for the straight guy' later on.. funny thing about my dad, tho.. he has banned my brother from watching the show(actually he does'nt really like me watching it either.) becoz he's afraid that armond will becum influenced by the 'happy' people on the telly.. really.. oookay.. can u say,'paraniod delusional?' hmm.

topic for discussion, y'all.. are true friends measured by how they treat you during your good times or your bad times? and how exactly do you measure friendship? juz becoz u have shared more experiences with one, does that make him/her a better/closer/whatever friend than the others?

what i think? i think friendship is a bridge that helps you cross the tough times that life's dramatic encores just bring on. i dont really have tonnes of friends. but my syg more than makes up for that. he's my bestest friend in the world, cuz he knows all there is to know about me, he understands me, and he helps me understand myself. i'm so lucky to have him..

and then there's wani, who i've not known for VERY long (i.e. not since primary one or anything..) but through the circumstances in which we met, and the many (quite alot, eh, babe?) trials we've had to undergo, some of which you would,nt wish on your enemies. and yet she's still here.. and i'm very grateful for that. thank you, babe.

Faisal.. what can i say. he's funny and a god mediator. been times when things woulda ended up really screw'd up w/o him, seh..
Ain, wacky gurl whom i think is underapreciated in all the things she does. FELLYSIDE lives on inside us, gurl. Here's to da Rat Race. more drama than the amazing race, and a helluva lot more makeup, too. hehe.

i guess that my little thank-you portion of my blog entry has been a leeetttllee late in coming, but i am sincere to whom i thank. My love, my sayang; zul.. I love you. thank you so much for putting up with my crap, syg.. thank you., wani, you know that i make you cry yet you keep coming back. why? i dunnoe. brain disorder, maybe? but i am really glad that you did. thank you. faisal, please du think ur ugly.. ur a gr8 guy, and someday some gurl is gonna see that. really. thank you for letting me know you. Ain, please dont be so worried about everything. things turn out alright in the end, if we just believe in the greatness of allah, and try not to screw up too much along the way, you know what i mean? thank you.

finally, to those reading this.. not many, i know.. but i hope you understand that i am a weird gal, im crazy sometimes and a lil over-reactive (dont u DARE say anything, zul..) but i love the people around me. and that, i think, is good enuf for me.

T.A.M.A.T. (deng-deng-deng...)

acidic raindrops and the knight of darkess..

teardrops from angels,
forlorn and in angst,
acidic and burning,
they're saddened by the pain that we've brought
upon ourselves.

i lay, dazed, on the bed that holds me close,
longing for the arms that keep me safe from the world.
my love, my faith, my very life,
i freely relinguish to him.

why the rains' put me in such a mood,
i do not hold the answer,
all i know is i feel lost and alone,
and this fear eats away at me like a tragic cancer.

the horizon gleams silvery-white,
like hope on a glistening platter,
though the sky above, the fallen angels' black cape covers me,
and their teardrops continue to scatter.

stay safe, my love, my dark-cloaked knight,
lancelot from the round table,
i'll see you in my dreams at night,
as soon as i am able...

lucid realities.., bleah.

time to say hello again..,
er,..

hello.
(lame i know..)

went to zul's chalet recently., had lotsa fun there,..
spent most of the time cooking, tho.. real 'wife' material, huh, sayang.

Had a talk recently with my dad.. who's been going through a rough patch
lately.., i think he realises that his little girl isn't so little
anymore.. its weird.. you're sitting there, talking to this man who's
been this control figure all your life and suddenly you feel the reins
loosening.. i know its a good thing. just hafta handle it responsibly.

on that note.. been doing a lot more errands for my mum and dad., seeing
as mum generally hasta stay at home and take care of him.. its odd..
i think the lady at the bank has assumed that i've taken control of the
company.. heehee.. but seriously. i've gained a new-found respect for
my mum, who before this was the one who did all the errand running.
and i feel a bit betta about myself, because this shows that my parents
have faith and trust me to carry out important company stuff.. i sound
sooooo obnoxious, tho.. but it's true, i tell you!! just got this
very weird feeling that i cant really describe.. i feel.. older? jeez.
did i just say that? 4get it.

came home after a month and a half.. and the house is soooo
dusty!! i think i've sneezed, like, a million times!! i HATE it!!
Zul seems to think its cute. i dont.
so i'm back to my usual.. cleaning up the house.. except now,
there's more dust, dead (and some not-so-dead) cockroaches
and lizards, dried grass(wtf did they come frm?), and other
odd things that creep into your house when you leave it
abandoned for a month++.. sigh.. and we dont have a maid. why?
dad says it good 'experience'. yeah. experience. that's the excuse
they all roll out when either they run into a lack of funds, lack
of space, lack of style or, in my parents' case, a lack of anything
better to do but to reduce their only daughter to slave labour,
just for kicks. (and you thought i was the spoilt one..)

but im not complaining..(oh wait.. ermm.. yeah.. to make that
statement true, kindly disregard the above.);p

i've missed everyone sooooo much!! it was teachers day a few, er,
days ago,..(??) and i missed heading down to RSS to see the sights..
tho i already know that i would have seen.. oh. the usual..
scores of graduating classes, whose students have eyebags the
size of j-lo's butt, a sense of humor that would be funny in
king john the 2nd's court.. (meaning which it is lame beyond
hope.) and the ever-present desire to toss either mrs. singh
or ms. chitra(preferably both) into a piranha-infested river.

oh happy day.

well.. i'll be back, hopefully with something interesting to say.
if not, i'll still be back, with something not so interesting.

oh. my. god. i am SO lame. this is what happens when you are not
around people(normal people) for extended periods of time..

and that does not include you, zul.. u most certainly are NOT normal.
but i love you!!

laters, all!!